my bird doesnt like me anymore

by Diana Smith
(Queensland, Australia)

I have a hand raired Rainbow Lorekeet called Lorry. I have had Lorry since Christmas 2007. Lorry has always been very close to me but not my husband or son. Lorry did'nt do a lot of flying until recently. He was so attached to me that I was unable to move from his cage where I put him to another room without him flying onto my sholder befor I got to the other room.

Recently he has not wanted to be put in his cage so that I could go out (he his put in his cage when no one is at home and is let out if someone is home), he has flown away and hid behind things so that he would not be put away. I have had to chase him from room to room and he has not stepped up onto my hand as he always has.

I have had to catch him with a grip to put him away. He now will not have a bar of me and is scared of me when I go near him. This has upset me greatly as he has been my baby for 10 months, has played with me and been with me and trusted me explicictly. What can I do and why doesnt he love me anymore.

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Sep 09, 2018
My feathered baby hates me too :(
by: Cutie Patootie's mommy

My Pineapple Green Cheek Conure is such a good flyer that I have to trim his feathers often. I wish I could just take him to the vet but it cost $75 each time. I decided once that I'd stop trimming his wings because he actually has very beautiful blue flight wings. They had hardly grown out when and he took flight and nearly got hit by the ceiling fans. We have vaulted ceilings too! And we live in Hawaii so ceiling fans are a must if you don't have AC. So, I had to go back to clipping his wings. But now slowly...he's starting to avoid me more. He doesn't want me to touch him anymore. He still gets upset when I leave the room and still calls out for me. But he's very cautious when I go near him now and runs away from my hand or flutters away. I'm so bummed... He's not even 2 years old yet and I hand fed him since he was a few weeks old. What sucks more, he can fly up high again and noticed his blue flight feathers are growing out already. Usually, his cage door is open during the day and he is free to roam about but I've had to keep him locked up for the past few days because of his flying escapade. Harder to catch him now because he doesn't want me to touch him. Do I still trim his wings? Is it cruel to keep him caged for so long? :(

Jun 20, 2018
My cockatoo wont let me touch her anymore
by: Anonymous

I have had my Goffin for 11 years , for two hours a day I would put her on my shoulder she would snuggle with me. When she heard my car pull up she would yell like yaa Mom is home. I always open the cage when I get home so she can go on top. I do not know what has happened but the last two months she will not let me touch her. If I go to pet he she flys out of her cage and I have to run around the house and get her by putting a towel on her. When I open the cage to feed her she flys to the bottom to make sure to get away from her. This is breaking my heart and I dont know what to do. My husband recently passed away and this is just giving me more heartache. What do I do?

Jan 25, 2018
mango the lovebird
by: Anonymous

I have a 10-month-old lovebird who is doing the same exact thing I got him in October and he was more attached to me than anyone else he used to kiss my fingers and sleep under my chin and I believe it is because I have been the one to put him away in his cage so he stays clear of my hand he will sit on my head and shoulder and face but if my hand comes close to him he freaks

Jul 03, 2017
Help with my budgie
by: Anonymous

Hi I have my budgie bobo 1 month he will eat from my hand and I don't think he fears me that much but will not step up onto my finger no matter how long i have my hand in front of him,, even if I get him onto my finger once he kind of knows he's on my finger he just jumps off

Editor's note: Visit for training help.

Mar 27, 2017
when bird fly's away
by: Anonymous

I am experiencing the same thing with my cocatiel, I always had to pick him up by my hand as he never did learn to step up, thing is now though when I go to get him, he flys away on me, he has since discovered that flying is so fun that he just flys away now, my husband seems to have more luck putting him in his cage if we go out, I don't think it is because he doesn't like me, but he just seems to think that is what he is supposed to do when I go over to him,, I just have to go over to him more often and reprogram him I think, however that being said, it takes time to program them in a different way

Mar 26, 2017
She doesn't like me anymore?
by: Anonymous

Pretty sure my Cockatiel doesn't like me anymore. She used to step onto my hand all the time, now she just flies away from me and then I'll have to chase her back and forth when its time to put her in her cage. But when she's out in her cage she'll be screaming for me to let her out.

Feb 22, 2017
Sun Conure does the same
by: Anonymous

My Sun Conure does the same, he is scared when I go near him and he doesn't let me pet him or he doesn't want to get on my finger, I try to let him out of his cage but he just stays behind his house, I need help to to see how he can love me again.

May 27, 2014
green cheeks
by: tammy

I have 2 now and I just got my bird back I had to sell him for health reasons for me .but my husband bought meeko back for me and now it seems like he hates me I hand fed him when he was a baby he used to jump off his cage and follow me in kitchen saying mee mee it was cute .so now I hold him close and kiss him and tell him mommy loves u and or back home to stay I do this every day so he can trust me again . and both my green cheeks get along great .

Aug 01, 2013
Me and Bo are doing a bit better step by step
by: Jena

At the pet store, I always used to play with him. When I took him home he was a sweet heart! Maybe a few weeks or months later he started molting which I was proud. But sooner, he would hate me getting him out of his cage! I couldnt belive it! We were such best friends. If your having trouble with your bird like me, it does take awile to get his trust back me and Bo are doing a bit better step by step. So far when he's on me and I lie down, he climbs up on my face, picking at my eyelashes. Its ok. Just take your time. Talk softly and proudly to your bird. And I found out that the reason some birds are scared to be taken out of there cage is because.. well imagine if these big hands just started chasing you. Hope this helped! Good luck.

Jul 26, 2013
My bird hated me but is coming slowly back
by: Anonymous

I am the person that clipped their conure and he hated me,, I have since talked gently to him for over two yrs now at his covered cage at night when I put them all to bed. I have two other birds as well. I have clipped him since but now I cover his face when I do it and I cuddle him under a towel for awhile after I finish before letting him back to his cage. He still can fly just a few feet into the living room and I will not take that away from him ever. I must keep him clipped a bit as he got outside once and I went through heck thinking he was lost forever. I could see him on the tree but couldn't reach him as a he caught a wind and glided over the hill. My husband got him back for me. He does not sit on my finger anymore as he hasn't gained trust for my hands, however if he falls to the floor he will allow me to pick him up with my hand and then he rushes up to my shoulder. Anyway the reason I am posting is that I wanted to share that I found if I take him in a dark room that I can put my hand towards him and he will sit on my hand for a bit. He will allow me to brush my face on his body and then I take him back to his cage showing him that it is only for a short time and it is tolerable. He does still give me kisses when he is on my shoulder and I love that. I do miss the closeness I had with him and I don't know if that is every to be again. I believe he is worth the wait.

Jul 26, 2013
My Indian Ringneck Charlie
by: Anonymous

I have a baby indian ringneck around 4 month old, we got him at 3 and he straight away became my best friend when all of a sudden he won't come on me like he normally did. He started to lunge at me and I didn't really want to be bitten so I backed off a bit, as I realised that that was what he wanted I carried on training him, turnes out all he wanted to do was lick me, he now flies down and lands on the arm of the settee, he lickes my phone when he is there and is really starting to settle in and realise the rules in the house. He licks me and is still friends with me but as he licks me he isn't so keen to come on my hand but he is slowly getting there. Just give him/she the same attention you did before and act the same, they might never come back to you as close as they were but you will soon get your friendship back!

Jun 11, 2011
Buzz is starting to like me more again
by: Anonymous

I started to talk to him gently at night for over two months now every night I cover him up and I tell him a story, I got tired of thinking of things to say so I now just repeat the Lords prayer over and over in different tones and now when I go to say it he is much more calmer with me. He is also alowed to fly a bit in the house which seems to give him some confidence back since I clipped him in Jan way too much and he lost his love for me. I will never do that again. I have clipped him once since then, but covered his head this time and I repeated the prayer as I was doing it so to calm him. He makes clicking noises as I say this prayer at night when he is covered up and I miss him sitting on my finger like he used to so much that I just stand there and say it many times just to hear him click click. I think it is bringing him closer to me but he still is not sure about me, however he will jump on me after he lands in the living rm from the dining rm after his little flight and then I take him back to his cage, he is out with the other two birds I have most of the day if I am home. They have trees that are attached to their cages and I just sweep and mop the floor, they can get kind of messy at times but I love them, I have a Black Cap Conure and a Cockatiel too, the one that got mad at me it a Green Cheek Conure.

Editor's note: If you want people to see and answer, you need to post a question, not an answer here to another question, at Parrot Questions

Jun 10, 2011
My bird hates me after finding her.
by: Monae

My cockatiel stopped loving me after I found her. I lost her for two months and the last ounce of love I saw was when I was retrieving her off someone's roof. I called her and she answered me,then I raised her favorite cage in which she flew down to me. After bringing her home she hated me, just like that. We were sooo close and it hurts a lot not having her fly around and explore like she used to. Now when I can get her out her cage when she flies it's like she's fleeing. Most of the time she just sits in her cage day and night and only talks to other wild birds. Sometimes though, when I leave the room she screams for me but when I get close she just hisses at me. I've tried everything but it's like it gets me nowhere. It already hurt deeply when she was lost but this is worst. I remember when I couldn't get her off my hands, now she hisses seeing them. I used to give her kisses everyday, snuggles, peek-a-boos, we had this game we invented where I'd give her a Q-tip or a straw and she'd twirl it in her beak then drop it and she'd wait for me to pick it up then she'd snatch it from me to do it all over again, she used to ALWAYS eat from me, so many more memories I miss. Can anyone help me? I found my bird but I miss her even more that she's home.Thank you

Editor's note: If you want people to see and answer, you need to post a question, not an answer here to another question, at Parrot Questions

Feb 13, 2011
my Green Cheek
by: Anonymous

I am so upset with myself, I cut my conures wings and had no help so I did it by holding one wing in my hand and putting him in the sink I didn't cover his eyes. Also we had to leave him a lot this week. Now he hates me and tries to jump from me off the cage and belly flops as I cut him too short. I feel like killing myself. I am bibolar and this is taking a toll on my health as he is my best friend and I am crying right now.

Editor's note: Please don't give up, and next time take him to your breeder, avian vet for the trim. It will take time for him to trust again, but it is possible.

Sep 11, 2009
My bird loves me again.
by: Ros

After a few months, quite a few tears and lots of patience my bird has started to love me again. It started about 2 months ago with her getting on my shoulders and arms again and slowly moved on from there. She has recently started to lay on her back on me and kick me and bite me in play. She is also hanging off my clothes when I wander around the house and she happily plucks and preens and climbs all over me. But it took months so if it happens to anyone else remember it takes a lot of time and patience.

Jul 31, 2009
My bird doesn't love me anymore either.
by: Ros

It is very sad isn't it. My bird hasn't loved me for two weeks and I miss her terribly. she used to hang off me no matter what I was doing from when I got home from work to when she went to bed and now she wont come near me except for meal times. How has your baby come along.?

Sep 12, 2008
Bird not liking you anymore
by: Tracie

Although my situation was not exactly like yours, I also had a bird that suddenly decided he hated me.

I am with my birds more than anyone in the family. I sit at my desk all day, 6 days a week for 12 - 14 hours a day, about 6 feet from their cages. I am the one that feeds them and cleans their cages too.

One day Buddy, my Green Cheeked Conure, decided he didn't like me anymore and wanted my husband instead. He would tolerate my daughter, but would bite the fire out of me. Being a bird person, I didn't fret too much, but it did hurt inside.

My husband helped the bird like me again over the next few months by showing his disapproval when Buddy would lunge to bite me.

Your situation is very different, but I wanted to encourage you that you can gain his trust again and he may very well like you again.

I am still not Buddy's favorite, but Buddy will come and sit with me most of the time. I have treats that he likes that ONLY I give him. He mainly likes me when my husband is at work, but he is still nice to me when he is home because I am the only one he gets special treats from.

Try to watch his body language and don't let him out of the cage if you are going to have to chase him to get him back in the cage. I would suggest a wing clip so that you don't add the offense of chasing him to the problem.

If he acts like he doesn't want you to get him out of the cage, then simply open the door and sit there with the treat in your hand for a while. Talk calmly and sweetly to him and maybe even ignore him part of the time if that helps.

Go slow and don't rush things. You will eventually gain his trust again and maybe even his favor.

Sep 11, 2008
by: Kralice4u


You stated that he is put away when you leave and let out when you are home.
It does not sound to me like he does not love you anymore, but that he loves you so much that he does not want you to leave him.
I have a little one (Conure) named Chaos that loves me emmencely, but he can tell when I am getting ready to go somewhere. He runs and tries to get in my pocketbook! He is free to roam the house when I am home, but I put him in the "Bird room" when I leave and close the door. Once when I was leaving he tried to bite my hands and he squaked and ran all over the house because he knew that he was not going to leave with me.
He is very docile any other time (Except when I am leaving).I have since learned that when I am leaving (and not taking Chaos with me) not to put my shoes on in front of him or verbally express that I am leaving until he is put in the bird room!
On the other hand, if you find that your Lorry used to be close to you and is now close to another member in your house, it still does not mean that he hates you. Birds have been known to be close to one family member and then switch to being close to another family member.
Make sure that you spend the same amount of time with your companion each day. Often times when people start to spend less time with their birds, the bird may become stressed because of it.
Good luck with Lorry!

Sep 10, 2008
It going to be ok
by: Lewis

It is going to be ok you just cared him. Give him time do not push yourself on him and let him learn to trust you again. Also you might want to think of having his wings clipped. A bird with wings clipped and a training stand will help.


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